Human beings naturally seek to understand their social status in relation to others. I think acknowledgement and recognition are powerful tools for enhancing status and fostering supportive behaviour. However, when people are uncertain about what to expect, they tend to become defensive. To create a sense of safety, it’s important to provide clarity about what they will experience. When coaching, understanding my own behavioural patterns helps me relate more effectively to my clients.
Societal pressures
Women are often socialised to prioritise agreeableness and conflict avoidance, which makes the experience of being disliked particularly challenging, especially in high-pressure leadership roles. Research shows that women in leadership positions are more likely to face negative reactions when asserting authority or making unpopular decisions. A study from the Harvard Business Review found that women leaders are disproportionately criticised for behaviours that are seen as acceptable in their male counterparts. I think women who advocate for kindness and justice must also be willing to confront the challenges of standing firm in their values, even when it means facing opposition, retaliation, or bullying. And this aligns with findings from the Korn Ferry Institute, which suggests that women leaders often face a “double bind,” where they are expected to be both empathetic and assertive, a combination that can be difficult to balance in environments where these traits are not equally valued.
Our ability to navigate challenges
Things outside of you will not fix things inside of you if the things inside of you are broken. It’s a fallacy that achieving something outside of yourself will make you happy. For example, consider the story of Jan, who spent years chasing material success, believing it would bring him fulfilment. However, despite achieving great professional acclaim and wealth, he found himself plagued by a deep sense of emptiness and dissatisfaction. All of our problems come from within, but we persistently attribute them to external circumstances and biases. Even though I think it’s time to accept responsibility for our internal state and recognise that true happiness stems from within, independent of external achievements or circumstances. It’s important to highlight that internal factors, such as cognitive biases, emotional regulation, coping strategies, etc., all play a crucial role in how individuals perceive and respond to external circumstances, and this is supported by research in both cognitive and positive psychology. There are also external factors that can play significant roles in shaping individuals' experiences and challenges, for example, systemic injustices, environmental influences, and interpersonal relationships.
Athletes don’t crack under pressure
Working in sales means that you are speaking to people every single day and just like in sports not everyone is going to like you. I think sales is a great career for sportspersons and competitive minded individuals who are continuously looking to grow themselves. Sportspersons know how to work together as a team, we know how to take coaching, we know how to communicate, we know how to prepare, we know how to lose and bounce back from that loss and have another win. You may not get it all these things if you haven’t played elite sports. Once you have played elite sports then you understand how to get through challenging moments and I’m convinced that you have gained that resilience and toughness to make it through tough times.
Learn to sell
The ability to get along with others and show an interest in the world around them is essential for sales professionals. If you can find someone with a problem and they will pay you money to solve the problem, you will never have a financial problem and you will be of service to people. Sounds easy! Would you like to learn to sell?
Here’s a simple formula to follow:
- Here's what this product or service is.
- Here's what it does.
- Here's how it can help you.
- Here's why I think it's worth it.
- Here's why you should take action right now.
Resilience is also vital if you want to succeed as you are likely to get knocked back a fair few times on the road to success. Just because one person isn’t interested, you just have to keep going. And that resilience, that refusal to give up in the face of adversity, is another lesson we can all take forward into our lives, no matter how old we are. Contact me via e-mail for sales training and workshops.
The struggle is real
“Resilience is accepting your new reality, even if it’s less good than the one you had before. You can fight it, you can do nothing but scream about what you’ve lost or you can accept that, and try to put together something that’s good. ”