The ability to listen is even more effective in the personal development arena than just telling your audience to join the mission. As effective communication involves crafting narratives that resonate with your audience, appealing to their emotions, values, and aspirations. By presenting a clear and compelling story, you can inspire others to share your passion and align themselves with your goals. I think effective communication is not solely about talking or delivering persuasive messages, it also entails actively listening and understanding the perspectives, needs, and desires of your audience. The act of listening is a powerful tool in personal development and relationship-building as by attentively listening to others, you gain insights into their motivations, concerns, and aspirations. And this will enable you to tailor your messages and initiatives to resonate more deeply with their interests and address their specific needs.
The oldest tool of influence
When you believe that something is worthwhile, you not only commit to pursuing that goal but also become driven to effectively communicate and persuade others to join you in your endeavours. I think this holds true in both personal and professional scenarios. The art of communication and storytelling, often referred to as sales, becomes essential when pursuing a partner, inspiring employees, attracting investors, building a personal brand, or engaging with customers. The ability to convey your vision, values, and aspirations in a compelling manner is crucial for capturing the attention and support of others.
Clarity 3 of 3
Do or should you care?
I think this question is crucial for individual employees and their engagement within an organisation. When leaders effectively communicate the organisation's purpose, values, and goals, employees will evaluate their alignment with these factors. Clarity in communication allows individuals to understand the impact of their work and whether it resonates with their own values and aspirations. When employees see the significance of their contributions, this fosters a sense of commitment, pride, and engagement within the organisation.
Clarity 2 of 3
What value does your organisation serve?
Identifying the value or purpose an organisation serves is closely tied to its mission. I think this involves recognising the impact the organisation has on its stakeholders, whether it's customers, clients, employees, or the broader community. Leaders should be able to clearly articulate the unique value proposition of the organisation and how it differentiates itself from competitors. This clarity helps employees understand the significance of their contributions and how they can create value through their work.
Clarity 1 of 3
Why does your organisation exist?
I think understanding the purpose and reason for an organisation's existence is essential for both leaders and employees. It also provides a sense of meaning and helps guide the decision-making process. By articulating the organisation's mission and vision, leaders can clarify the overall objective and communicate it to the entire team. This clarity allows individuals to understand how their work contributes to the larger picture and motivates them to strive towards shared goals.
Don't shoot yourself in the foot
Are you familiar with the perverse incentives?
Yes, a perverse incentive is an incentive that has an unintended and undesirable result that is contrary to the intentions of its designers. The cobra effect is the most direct kind of perverse incentive, typically because the incentive unintentionally rewards people for making the issue worse. I have seen many wonderful buildings with useless signage, for example, Heathrow Terminal 5. There are many examples of how incentives can have unintended consequences and lead to perverse outcomes, for example, paying doctors based on the number of procedures they perform, rather than the quality of care they provide as this can incentivize doctors to perform unnecessary procedures. Another example is providing subsidies to farmers for growing certain crops even if they are not in high demand, leading to oversupply and lower prices.
I think that in these turbulent times we should all be aware of perverse incentives as they can arise in various contexts, including government policies, corporate cultures, and social norms. Stay vigilant!
It becomes a different thing
““Change your story, change your life. Basically, that’s what it is.” ”
In B2C decision making we are trying to minimise the risk of regret and in B2B decision making, we are trying to minimise the risk of blame. If you change the story about something, you change its meaning and if you change the meaning, you change our visceral response to it, and if you change our visceral response to it, you basically change our evaluation of it. This is essentially how decision-making works. Things are not things, we respond to things in a context from which we derive meaning, the meaning derives an emotion, the emotion drives a behaviour, and the behaviour then drives an act of post rationalisation.
Buy less and buy better
Rhetoric is the art of effective or persuasive speaking or writing, especially the exploitation of figures of speech and other compositional techniques. Aristotle said great communication comes down to three things:
· Ethos – Ethics, values, the credibility of the person speaking, for example, “Am I worth listening to?”
· Logos – Evidence, facts, the logic, or apparent logic of what they are saying, for example, “Am I right?”
· Pathos – The emotions of the audience, for example, “Do I care?”
Aristotle also said that you could not win an argument with just one of these things, to win an argument, you will need each of the three to be always present. And as soon as you think about communication from the receiver’s perspective, you can see that he was correct.
The Universal Story Structure
Gustav Freytag was a 19th Century German novelist and playwright who developed a visual representation of the five-act structure common in classic plays and novels. This structure is known as Freytag’s Pyramid or triangle, or “the "dramatic arc," and this a straightforward way of organising a tragic narrative into a beginning, middle, and ending, and is comprised of five distinct parts: introduction, rising action, climax, falling action, and resolution.
I think stories are powerful because they transport us into other people’s world and in doing that, they change the way our brain works and potentially change our brain chemistry. This is what it means to be a social creature and connect with others, to care about others even complete strangers and its so interesting that dramatic stories cause us to do this. The same thing can happen when we watch movies or listen to music, we feel uplifted, we feel motivated, or we feel connected to others around us.
The first fruit
Image c/o The Ecologist
““Sometimes a fruit falls from a tree and rolls so far away from its roots that it’s no longer of the tree. The hard fall, and long journey, bruises the fruit so much that it totally changes it. It’s the same way for some of our people. This is why some can’t be awakened regardless of how much truth you present to them. This journey has totally brainwashed them to such a degree that they’re no longer of the original tree.” ”
Louis Vuitton in Paris
How can you tell better stories about your products?
Stories speak to emotions, and it will result in a higher response. Facts and data can be leveraged but it’s the narrative that helps us to make sense of that data. I think that when you find a common ground and your audience can nod in agreement, then you will be in a better place to sell them something. All storytellers use contrast whether intuitively or consciously and it’s one of the most powerful devices in storytelling, for example, day and night, heroes and villains, good and bad, etc. When selling new products, I have found that we operate in the realm of what is versus what can be, and this is a powerful contrast. Don’t limit yourself to the story about the problem and the solution, see beyond and see what you can do in terms of contrast.
““My way of life is very simple, even though nowadays, success tends to be linked to fame, high life, and luxury.””
The confidence gap
It’s not a weakness or character flaw to be wrong, make a mistake or change your mind. In fact, in areas of knowledge, technology and competition, it’s a mark of courage, character and flexibility to be willing to cut your loses quickly and practice the reality principle in everything you do. I think that once you say I was wrong or I made a mistake or I changed my mind, the issue is largely over. One must be prepared to deal with the world as it is rather than the way you wish it were or the way it might have been in the past. Face the truth whatever it is and be honest with yourself and everyone around you. Always be open to reevaluating your goals and objectives in the light of new information, technology, or competition.
Athletes of the business world
In the future we will need people who can connect and communicate. And we will need people to transfer confidence, emotion, and a positive view of the world. We don’t need people to send e-mails as anyone including robots can send e-mails to promote products and services. I think salespersons are the athletes of the business world as they intrinsically enjoy competition. Successful salespeople are goal-oriented and self-motivated and these are also defining qualities of high-performing athletes.
The complexity of listening
Joseph DeVito in his book, “Essentials of Human Communication” divided the listening process into five stages: receiving, understanding, remembering, evaluating and feedback. I think by becoming aware of what is involved with active listening and where difficulties might lie, you can prepare yourself both as a listener and as a speaker to minimise listening errors with your own public speeches. Contact me via e-mail and let me know whether you are aware of the verbal and nonverbal ways of indicating your appreciation for or your disagreement with the messages or the speakers at the end of the message.
“Your style introduces you before you even speak.”
Risking your reputation
Many brands are built on a single belief that "claims" superiority in a crowded marketplace. Managing expectations is the practice of communicating information to prevent gaps between stakeholder perceptions and business realities. The theory of strategic narrative are tools that actors employ to promote their interests, values, and aspirations. Inaccurate stakeholder assumptions can result in failures and perceptions of failure. When working with brands I think strategic narratives should define "who we are" and "what kind of world order we want."
“You have to willingly give and graciously receive, and if you have to think before you give then you are trading.”
Rhetoric and the art of persuasion
Image c/o TED ED
When we have conflicting views over truth, we often enter into a game of persuasion where we try to convince the other that the belief we hold is, in fact, the true one. Rhetoric creates a partnership for a system of persuasion based on knowledge instead of upon manipulation and omission. Over 2,000 years ago the Greek philosopher Aristotle argued that there were three basic ways to persuade an audience of your position: ethos, logos, and pathos. To craft a good persuasive argument, we must consider these three things.
1. The character of the speaker (ethos)
2. The condition of the listener (logos)
3. The strength and plausibility of the argument itself (pathos)
Same same but different
When we find ourselves swimming in an ocean where everybody is trying to make similar content, the differences will be found in the intention of why people are making the content. And I think this is going to be the difference between why things work and why things don't work. The world is saturated with coaches, change your life books, do-gooders, etc., etc. The more successful we get the more of a test it is for the purity of the reasons why we create, and no one is exempt from that. We have to remain mindful and surround ourselves with people who tell you the truth, even though it can be hurtful, the truth is so important.
Stories speak to emotions
We all know that there are two sides of the brain, the rational and the feelings/emotional side. In almost all kinds of decisions the emotional side of the brain is predominant, and stories speak to emotions. Nowadays when we are inundated with data and information it’s even more important that we focus on stories. You can speak about numbers, data and facts and leverage that in your storytelling, as the narrative helps us make sense of that data. I think that when we speak to people’s emotions it gathers and results in a higher response. Watch this video and see how changing the message will change the results.
Reading the room
First, you read what you see - I mean reading body language. Salespersons soon learn that if the customer have their arms folded and chin tucked down with a frown on their face then this is going to take all your skills to get their arms unfolded and make them a little more comfortable. Crossed arms and legs are a clear signal that there is resistance to your ideas. Second, you’ve got the read what you hear. If it’s a two-way conversation you must listen as well as talk. We have two ears, one mouth, therefore, we should listen twice as much as we speak. Listen so that you know how to proceed and the best way to improve your listening skills is to practice "active listening." And finally, you have to pick up the emotional signals, for example, are you coming on too strong? How does your customer feel? etc.
I think reading the room is an art form; first what you see, then what you hear and finally what you feel. Speaking the same language as your customers is a subtle way to make them feel more welcomed. Contact me via e-mail for 1:1 session or to arrange a “reading the room” workshop for your team.
Read the room
c/o New York Times
How can you improve the collaboration with your customers, internal stakeholders and colleagues?
The best storytellers, authors and speakers paint pictures giving the audience something they can visualise in their heads. They communicate the central issues of the discussion in a clear, fluent, and precise manner, and when they produce written material it’s clear, fluent, and easy to understand for the recipients. I think communication means both words and emotions, and what’s really powerful are words loaded with emotion. When communication flows with the right messaging, at the right time through the right channels, it can move nations, help people change directions, and establish an ideology for the good or bad.
You’ve got to develop your own style, become a student of style, and do this by not copying any one person. Everyone knows the old classic, “It’s not just what you say it’s also the way that you say it.” Your presentation will become more effective when you communicate with your heart and soul from deep inside with commitment and dedication. Contact me via e-mail to schedule a communication workshop for your team.