personal

As you can see

In my experience, smart people never talk about how smart they are, as they are too busy growing their minds. I have made some observations of smart people, and I think that they tend to:

1. Change their mind
2. Read and write more
3. Have great manners
4. Talk less but say more
5. Stay teachable
6. Show gratitude
7. Ask more questions
8. Work on problems longer
9. Anticipate outcomes
10. Seek feedback


Rinse and repeat

One thing I've learned that when you "win", you can't come back the same way twice. You need to have a new mindset, a new fire, a new approach if you want to secure victory over and over again. And this must be all based on universal principles. Therefore, when success begins to slip from your fingers, for whatever reason, the response isn’t to grip and claw so hard that you shatter it to pieces. It’s to understand that you must work yourself back to the aspirational phase. You must get back to first principles and best practices.  

Two principals of a happy life:
1. Use things and not people.
2. Love people and not things.
— Unknown

Health is wealth

I am currently re-reading the New York bestselling book, “Rich Dad Poor Dad” by Robert T. Kiyosaki. In a recent conversation with my son I said, “Wealth is measured in time, rich is measured in money.” And this allowed me to go deeper into the subject and explain that one could argue that wealth is measured in time because time is a finite resource that is equally distributed among all individuals. No amount of money can buy more time, so how we choose to use the time we have reflects our true wealth. On the other hand, being rich is often measured in monetary terms because having a large amount of money can provide us with financial security and the ability to purchase material goods and experiences that contribute to our quality of life. Ultimately, the definition of wealth and being rich can vary depending on one's personal values and goals.

“Money is numbers and numbers never end. If it takes money to be happy, your search for happiness will never end.”
— Bob Marley

Smart people

The traits that characterise a smart person can vary depending on individual perspectives and definitions of intelligence. However, I think some commonly recognised traits of smart people include:

1.         Curiosity: Smart people tend to be curious and have a strong desire to learn and explore new things.
2.         Open-mindedness: They are open to new ideas and perspectives and are willing to consider alternative viewpoints.
3.         Critical thinking: They have the ability to analyse and evaluate information, and to think logically and creatively.
4.         Adaptability: Smart people are able to adapt to changing situations and are flexible in their thinking.
5.         Persistence: They are determined and persistent in the face of challenges and setbacks.
6.         Emotional intelligence: They have good social skills and are able to empathise with others.
7.         Good communication skills: They are able to articulate their thoughts and ideas effectively.
8.         A broad range of knowledge: They tend to have a wide range of interests and knowledge in various subjects.

I think it’s important to note that intelligence is not limited to these traits alone, and that everyone has their own unique strengths and abilities.


Embrace the challenges

Part of being an adult is that you have to plan your day. If you know you’re capable of more, a big reason why you’re not doing what you said you were going to do is because you didn’t plan out when you were going to do it. Nowadays, we are all dancing on a template trying to figure out how to deal with our current circumstances. There are always lot of ups and downs and I have accepted that it is supposed to be this way - What about you?
My mantra for April will be as follows: “I’m really excited about all the chaos in my life, and I am really looking forward to see how it all plays out.”


I do my best

I’m constantly taking in information, I read a lot of books and listen to loads of podcasts, I use some of the information. I don’t just copy/paste it as it’s conceptual and I like to understand what’s going on behind it, the theory, the thinking and this drives people mad because I can speak about methods and models all day long. Fundamentally, this is how I like to work – taking things down to its deepest level of understanding and then construct it relative to the context or situation, and how I can apply to what you are doing. One should always take the time, effort, and energy to think about the information you are receiving. When you get a real understanding for something, then you can see whether you really agree with the fundamental principles and either follow them or question them and develop your own ideas.


Advice on Mother’s Day

Mother's Day is a celebration honouring the mother of the family or individual, as well as the influence of mothers in today’s society. Mother's Day is celebrated on different days in many parts of the world. Here’s some advice from my mother RIP:

Character is a door opener, so be honest.
You may be wrong, so be humble.
Luck seeks the thankful, so be grateful.
Givers end up with more, so be generous.
Artists believe in their craft, so be courageous.
You will also make mistakes, so be forgiving.
You will be happier., so always be yourself as everyone else is taken.


Small steps stick

When trying to make a change in your life, a too big a change is not sustainable. It’s far easier to make small, incremental changes and make them stick. It’s important to reframe change into a positive and stick to it. Try telling yourself that change isn’t a chore, improving isn’t a chore! It’s the stickability over time that makes us different.

 

When we feel good about ourselves, we are going to be happier, more engaged, and willing to make more changes. It’s not about what happens to us, it’s about how we deal with it. When people think about habit loops, they often have a reward at the end of it. It’s really important to think about the suffering, as I think change happens when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of making a change.


These basic things

What are you doing to help the people relieve the tension?
I make a conscious effort to smile throughout the day and take the time to appreciate the little things, for example, the architectural detail on buildings. A simple smile, can reduce stress, help heart health, lower blood pressure, and boost your immune system by decreasing cortisol in the body. Smiling, genuine or even forced, prompts the brain to produce endorphins and serotonin which may have a positive effect on your mood. Try it – SMILE. I think that if we make new behaviours fun, we are far more likely to do them in a consistent and repeatable way.


Sharing experiences

What is essential to you, and who are the persons who have helped you become the person you are?

We just don’t get to be competent human beings without a lot of different investments from others, people who have loved you, encouraged you, and wanted what was best in life for you. I know that you have had at least one person who has believed in you. As human beings we are all intimately related, so it will never be the honours, prizes or fancy outfits which will nourish our souls. It’s the knowing that we can be trusted and that we never have to fear the truth. This is the bedrock of our lives from where we make our choices, deep down we all know that what really matters in life is more than winning for ourselves. What really matters is helping others win too, even if it means slowing down and changing direction now and then. I think you don’t make change for others; you make change for yourself.

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eyes.”
— Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

External validation

c/o Health Shots

Are you comfortable in an environment where you must figure a lot of things out for yourself? I mean making decisions on your own. If you are someone who really needs a lot of validation to decide and is uncomfortable with having that blank slate and thinking for yourself then self-employment is not for you. You can grow so quickly at a start-up where you can build your skills after being thrown into the “deep end.” Contact me via e-mail to book coaching, mentoring or 1:1 sparring sessions.


Focus on being

© Aleksandr Simonov

Mindfulness is based in Eastern philosophy, and has been describes as deliberately seeing what is in front of you, being fully present, and noticing what you’re doing, thinking and feeling in the moment. Mindfulness is gaining recognition as an approach to business and to risk management. From my perspective, meditation continually teaches me how to develop a different relationship to my thoughts and emotions. When my mind gets distracted by the commentary, I try to refocus on the being, in other words the present moment. Focusing on these micro moments are the key to mindfulness and has helped me reprogram my stress response. More present, more aware, less wound-up, less reactive and this has a huge effect on how I deal with situations around me.

The older you get, the more quiet you become. Life humbles you so deeply as you age. You realise how much nonsense you’ve wasted time on.
— Vala Afshar

How to maintain a healthy lifestyle

It’s a common myth that getting fit is only about eating healthy and exercising. In reality, creating a healthy lifestyle and maintaining it is also about being able to keep a positive attitude, strong mental health and a healthy self-image. Here are some key factors to keep in mind:

  1. Get more sleep

  2. Find time to exercise

  3. Drink more water

  4. Eat less sugar

  5. Do not respond to negativity

  6. Write more

  7. Remove clutter

  8. Make your bed

  9. Be patient

  10. Listen more

  11. Laugh loudly

  12. Breathe deeply

  13. Stay calm

  14. Be honest


The act of comparing

As humans, we are always comparing ourselves to each other and when we compare ourselves to others, we may be left with feelings of inferiority or superiority, I have always said comparisons are the theft of joy. Era comparisons are the most fruitless of conversations given the differences in variables on aspects such as science, tactics and even technology.

Comparison is the thief of joy.
— Theodore Roosevelt

Rational vs. emotional decision making

The University of Virginia psychologist, Jonathan Haidt introduced me to a compelling elephant-rider analogy for thinking about behaviour change. Haidt argues that we have two sides: an emotional side (the elephant), and an analytical, rational side (its rider). Haidt's analogy has it that the rider is rational and can therefore see a path ahead while underneath him, the elephant provides the power for the journey. If the elephant chooses to go in another direction, is there anything the rider could do to stop it? From a pure physics standpoint, the answer is obviously “no”. The reality is the rider is not in charge, the elephant is and chooses to go where the rider wants to go. I think the big take away from this is in life, the rider is in the head and the elephant is in the heart. And it’s a useful framework for understanding the duality of human decision making.


A full understanding

Today is my father’s 85th birthday and to mark the occasion I would like to recognise some of his good qualities:
Appreciate the people who tell you the truth.
Appreciate the people who expand your mind.
Appreciate the people who forgive you first.
Appreciate the people who open doors for you.
Appreciate the people who make you laugh.
Appreciate the people who inspire you to grow.