Story is the oldest human technology, it is the way that we communicate an idea to someone else. The story we tell ourselves, it’s the story we tell others about ourselves and we don’t have to tell it in words. It’s a story about oneself, it’s a story about health, sex, commitment. All of those pieces add up to the narrative we have about who we are and how we want other people to see us. Contact me via e-mail and tell me your story.
The science of possibility
If you can’t explain it, it’s not wired in your brain but if you can build the model and explain it, you will be installing the neurological hardware into your brain in preparation for the experience. Therefore, the more you understand what you are doing and why - the how will get easier because you can assign meaning to it.
The people who get their intentions to match their behaviours, their actions equal to their thoughts and then get the mind and body to work together - are going to have a new experience. The experience is not only going to enrich the philosophical circuits in the brain, because experience does that, it will produce an emotion. So then they will begin to feel unlimited, they will begin to feel free, they will start teaching their body chemically what the mind has always understood. Happy days! Contact me via e-mail for mentoring or coaching.
Why measurement is hard
One of the first steps in solving a problem — data science or otherwise — is determining the right measure to gauge success. When we want to objectively find the best solution, we should recall the concept of Goodhart’s Law and realise that rather than using a single number, the best assessment is usually a set of measurements. By choosing multiple metrics, we can design a solution without the unintended consequences that occur when optimising for a narrow objective. Goodhart’s Law states: “When a measure becomes a target, it ceases to be a good measure.” In other words, when we set one specific goal, people will tend to optimise for that objective regardless of the consequences. This leads to problems when other equally important aspects of a situation are neglected.
When using technology, people tend not to listen to their eyes and ears. Instead, a person is only making a judgement about a person through the distilled information. I have recently completed a digital marketing course and know now how to “game algorithms”. This has now convinced more than ever that in person meetings are a better gauge of a person’s integrity compared to looking at their social media feeds. When meeting face-to-face we can pick on mannerisms, for example, how the person speaks, how they appear, how they engage with their surroundings and a whole host of tangible and intangible behaviours.
Life is a balancing act, and social media has opened the world to the tensions of two forces: the ones measuring and the ones behaving. I think Goodhart’s Law is one of those paradoxes not to be solved but to be balanced. Contact me via e-mail when you are ready for an external perspective on your organisation’s measuring tools.
Peter Pan
“Those who bring sunshine into the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. ”
You will become unstoppable
What do you think about the headline?
You will be unstoppable when you create a purpose for your work that is bigger than yourself! How many great minds with solutions to big problems are out there? And many of them are blocked by the same problems. Some of the most defining moments in our lives happen around our traumas. I think if you don’t have a reason or story - in other words a purpose - to keep showing up and doing the work, then it will wear you down.
I think what makes you unique and stand out from the sea of competition is who you are and how you are working with people. How you do what you do and the beliefs and values that you emphasise in your process. I guarantee that you will feel empowered when you start to pick up on that divine purpose you have for being here on the planet. All the roadblocks in your way will be more easily overcome. In reality people want to work for an organisation and in a team where there is meaning behind what they do.
Thank you for all you’ve done for me
Today is my mother’s funeral.
Time is short, opportunity is scarce and the number of opportunities that we get to help somebody to find their story, that they can live inside, remember and elevate are very small.
Thanks mum ❤️
The language of successful managers
When I look back at the number or courses I have attended where there has been a lot of smiling and nodding. I often wonder about how many people then go back to their organisations and continue doing what they think works. Managerment who continue to only look at the numbers, seeing the agents/distributors as tools rather than members of the team.
The language that successful managers use:
How can I help?
What do you think?
Your work matters
I trust you and our team
I appreciate your commitment
Thank you for working hard
I was wrong, I am sorry
Your career path is my priority
Do you have the tools to succeed?
The path to excellence
“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”
Prevention is better than a cure
Dear managers,
Your team need you now more than ever, they need emotional support. I know you may be consumed with solving problems and overwhelmed with keeping your organisation running. Your team members may also fear that as you hold the key to their future advancement, you may view their request for help as a weakness. Therefore, you may want to take in an external mentor. A mentor can play a critical role, providing the team with someone who can help and guide them when they’re scared, burned out or confused, and all off the record.
Managers, please contact me via e-mail to arrange a meeting. While virtual mentoring may not be as satisfying as the in-person kind, there is evidence supporting its efficacy. In ways large and small, one person can make a lasting difference, even a few words, mentioned in passing, can last a lifetime.
Yours faithfully
Stephen
Perfection doesn't exist
I don’t believe in perfectionism! You need perfection in manufacturing and measurable systems, but perfection is the biggest killer of creativity. According to the Harvard Business Review: Perfectionism is a double-edged sword. On one hand, it can motivate you to perform at a high level and deliver top-quality work. On the other, it can cause you unnecessary anxiety and sometimes annoy your colleagues. Currently, the system isn’t built for discovery, it’s built for being told and when it makes no sense, I struggle and question the logic.
“One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. Perfection simply doesn’t exist.....Without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist.”
To see and be seen
After my many years of learning, unlearning and relearning about myself, my relationship with the fashion/lifestyle industry and my place within the system, I can’t start talking about fashion without naming the external elements that allow this industry to exist. Just like any other business, fashion companies provide solutions to specified sectors of global communities answering their needs based on the individual and collective life continuum that the community requires to coexist.
“Fashion must be the most intoxicating release from the banality of the world.”
I think fashion is art, it’s commerce, it’s function, it’s expression and what comes next will be marvellous! Fashion is about storytelling through clothing! It’s about the stories behind them and the ones you create around them. Contact me via e-mail and let me know what you think?
Listen to the little voice
c/o NLP Daily
Many of the happiest men and women in our society today are those who, at a certain point, got up and walked away from a situation that they finally realised was not making them fulfilled or happy. And they had the courage to decide that they were going to do what they loved to do, rather than what they felt they had to do. They looked deep within themselves and honestly assessed their own natural talents and abilities.
Aspiring vs being
“Money won’t make you happy... but everybody wants to find out for themselves.”
Sales is a performance game
In sales, our brain, our memory, our ability to recall our process, where we are in the deal and what we should be doing is pretty important. Whether we are in front of a client, on the telephone with them or giving a presentation, there are so many going through our minds. We have to have acts, systems, processes for remembering the things that matter - to make sure we are hitting the point whilst we are still listening. Not getting lost in the weeds and forgetting the steps they shout be taking to move the deal forward.
How many times after the meeting do we ask, I wish that I had asked that question? This is hard and if we don’t practice it outside of the moments, what ends up happening is that we miss what’s going on. In the game of sales, memory is a critical element of our sales ability - we have to remember facts about our product, company, how we compete but we also have to really remember and think about what the other person is thinking, what they care about. I think this is why sales is a performance profession. Sales is not just knowing what and how and having the facts, it’s how you present them and how you execute your game.
What are you grateful for?
Dr. Robert Emmons said, “You can’t feel envious and grateful at the same time. They’re incompatible feelings, because if you’re grateful, you can’t resent someone for owning things you don’t.” When we express gratitude, our brain releases dopamine and serotonin - two hormones that make us feel lighter and happier inside. I think we experience gratitude when we move our focus from what we don’t have to what we do, and when we take time to appreciate and be thankful for those who have contributed to the abundance in our lives. Contact me via e-mail and let me know what you are grateful for.
Last night changed it all
The racist abuse of England players Marcus Rashford, Jadon Sancho and Bukayo Saka is unforgivable. I just hope that these young men receive the psychologic help required, as sadly the abuse will continue throughout their lives.
The power of mystery
“Do not use your energy to worry. Use your energy to believe, to create, to learn, to think and to grow.”
The choice is yours
Image c/o Aspen Garfoot
Everyone has a choice of how to react to their various experiences. I was brought up to be like Teflon - the non-stick version. My mother would say, “Don’t let other peoples opinion of you become your reality.” I think that it’s essential to take responsibility and learn from the experiences, and I have seen others who are clueless about what happens to them.
“Experience is not what happens to you; it is what you do with what happens to you. ”
Have a great day and learn from your experiences.
I travel light
I don’t think that complete objectivity is possible! That’s a massive statement, but in reality If I led a media channel, for example, even if I didn’t mean for it to, it would naturally reflect some of my passions. So, when you have similarly educated people with similar backgrounds running all of the main media institutions, even if they don’t intend it, the outcome will obviously be biased. This week’s UEFA EURO 2020 Semi-Final between England and Denmark showed the problems with nationalism and how it makes people delusional and ugly. It’s hard to get better until you become humble.
I think the beauty of an action comes not only from when it becomes a habit, but also from its sensitivity, consciousness, clarity of perception and accuracy of response. The older I get, the more I realise that I am not compelled by any conditioning or programming from my past experiences or from my culture. Jamaican parent, British societal values and Danish awakening has stamped everything on me, fortunately, I am now in a position where I no longer react on the basis of my upbringing. I have learned how to experience things fully, both good and bad experiences. How to learn from them and then drop them, and move on to the next moment, uninfluenced by the previous ones. I travel light as I am uninfluenced by labels and titles, I just treat people with respect.
Rome wasn't built in a day
“People take different roads seeking fulfilment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost. ”